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As I mentor some of the girls in their efforts to save their predecessors, they often ask me questions like this:

We’ve been breaking up for about a month, but it’s been a long time since he’s been in a good state, and is he really determined to put it down?

Teacher, we only broke up a few days, he is not sad at all, is it really not concerned about me?

You may find that men are not only not very sad after a break-up, but a break-up is a relief to them. I cry every day, but the other side is very comfortable, such a huge difference makes many girls feel very angry!

“Stages of breakup for guys—-Boys break up after what state, when to save the best”

Below, let’s take a look at the journey of men’s hearts after breaking up.

Stage 1: Feel free and relaxed for a short time to return to singleness

There are generally four reasons why a man has offered to break up (or easily agreed to break up):

First, the woman has to do things that touch his bottom line;

Second, in the process of love, the woman is too “do”, non-stop to kill the enthusiasm and patience of men;

After the initial passion, men sway when weighing the pros and cons of the relationship;

Fourth, there is a third party to plug in the situation.

If it is the first three cases, men in the early parting of the break-up, in fact, will not feel very sad, and even they will be happy to return to single, regain freedom.

On the one hand, men are more rational than women, they have a natural superiority in emotional management;

So, at the beginning of the break-up, when you fall into pain can not help themselves, the other side may eat, drink and play, and without your constraints, he becomes more happy and free, can play games all night, whistle at passing beauty, plays more energetic than usual.

At this time, don’t be arbitrary to think that he really doesn’t love to put down.

“Stages of breakup for guys—-Boys break up after what state, when to save the best”

Many people will think that the initial break-up is the best time to recover, in fact, it is not like this, for men just jumped out of the “fire pit”, how can jump in again.

Of course, if you are in the fourth situation, then the situation is relatively complex, the teacher needs to help you analyze the specific strategy according to your different circumstances.

Stage 2: Loneliness strikes, emotions emerge

Happy days last about a week, the pain of breaking up will slowly reflect, about half a month, emotional appearance, loneliness, tangle, miss, regret.

At this time he will enter the memory period, and constantly recall your love of the past, sweet and bitter, pros and cons.

He does good and bad things, is he does not do enough or you have been in the foot, whether he is willing to change or can you change, you still have the possibility of being together and so on, he will continue to think about these issues, and he also began to struggle whether to save you.

At this stage, he’s likely to secretly observe you: circles of friends, shakers, or other platforms that can see how you’re going. He also wants to confirm your attitude to the relationship, so he’ll look for clues.

But if he sees a change in your growth, then he will regret it a little more, and there will be a compound of will to further observe you.

At this stage, women must be calm. Focus more on yourself.

1, first accept the break-up of their own, admit the fact of a break-up, manage their emotions, find the appropriate way to vent;

2, take back the attention focused on the other side;

3, pay attention to self-growth and self-change;

4, reading, fitness, yoga, travel, work, in short, to enrich their lives;

5, put their own growth to show;

6, can establish contact with each other, can temporarily avoid emotional topics.

Stage 3: Fall into a panic of loss

If after the break-up, in the first two stages you did not bother him, then at this stage, after-knowledge of the men, finally willing to face the break-up thing.

When they break up, men continue to feel that their girlfriends are still their own.

After the initial return to singleness, relaxation is the emptiness and loneliness after indulgence, and then in the stage of thinking, if you do not receive your “entanglement” signal, and now to the third stage, still do not receive your recovery information.

“Stages of breakup for guys—-Boys break up after what state, when to save the best”

In all your display platforms can not see your sadness, see that it is indeed your change, this time they will have a panic: whether they are going to lose you.

And, as time goes on, the negative effects of this relationship fade away and the judgment becomes relatively objective, and he begins to miss the days when he was with you.

Even start to enlarge your strengths: the little things you bought him, the food you ate together, the concessions you made in this relationship, every detail will stir up the impulse to save him immediately!

At this stage, you may still not see any of his attitudes, but until the night is quiet only their own, they will also be sad to cry.

Men with poor emotional self-control may choose to drink alcohol and paralyze their nerves when they reach this stage. 

Therefore, this stage is the best stage of active recovery.

Some people say that the cure for love is time and new joy, this time the man in the feelings of frustration, will be very eager to find someone to accompany themselves, often on the girls have no resistance, so this time is particularly easy to let the third party take advantage of.

So we should capture the opportunity of compounding when he feels lonely. The timing is delicate, and it can backfire if you take action too early in the early stages of a breakup, and if you don’t do anything at the right time, it’s easy to give the other person the feeling that “the breakup is a fact” and give him the courage to take the initiative to take action against you.

In the subject of love, everyone makes mistakes, but we all have a chance to make up for them. As long as you find the right way and understand the real answer, you can recover from the mistakes in love.

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