Recently received a letter from a visitor, he said that after a certain amount of study, with his girlfriend to make up, but still have the habit of chatting in social software, can not change, ask me how to do?
In fact, this situation is very common, most people are like to look for exciting new things, the same is true for feelings, but such behaviour will have an impact on feelings, so today on this topic, chat about online chat, what do men think?
First of all, in the psychological dynamics, online chat refers to men and women on the Internet beyond the ordinary dialogue chat content, these content often with some ambiguity and even teasing.
“No, eat cookies.”
“Hard or not?”
At a time when the rapid development of the Internet provides a comfortable environment for online chat, with the rise of various social software and platforms to make chatting with strangers extremely easy, it is more convenient to chat a few words of love on the virtual network, and according to the United States “information age cheating behaviour report” survey:
59 percent of women think it’s cheating on other heterosexuals, while only 42 percent of men think online dating chat is cheating, while only 55 percent of men think so.
Why do more than half of the boys think online chat isn’t cheating?
This has to do with men’s psychological drive.
Men are born eager to be seen to be recognized (face-to-face), so when a boy’s emotional needs are not met, or when emotional desires are not allowed, he shifts the impulse to an object that considers himself safe to alleviate his anxiety.
This is psychologically called the “replacement effect”.
Simply put, it’s not fun to be with your lover, you want to cheat and you don’t dare, so you switch to online chat.
Others like online chat people are often not liked in reality, so through online chat to show their funny humour, handsome and talented, so that they feel a sense of accomplishment.
Why do men in relationships go on dating sites—-What do you think about men 1
For example, “I’m just talking to him about comparison, we’re good friends.”
This kind of online chat is often an acquaintance or a circle of people.
For example, men’s junior high school classmates, colleagues, and even girls’ friends. The other party often also has a family, this kind of online chat reason is most dissatisfied with the current family life, or the lack of passion in the current feelings.
When you realize that your husband is starting to have this kind of online chat behaviour, the first thing to pay attention to in the process of getting along with you two, is not a long time not together in the world of two people?
Have you not eaten together for a long time, haven’t you calmed down together for a long time to have a good chat?
Do you know what’s wrong with his recent work?
Do you know what he’s like now?
So what you have to do at this time is to create a home environment, create some elaborate moments, do some things to make two people happy, get back the passion, and must be hot iron, in the closest time to explain to him that this behaviour is very jealous, since it is a friend, comb the relationship, some words or not to say too much.
Why do men in relationships go on dating sites—-What do you think about men 2
Some men would say, “She’s really pathetic, I just want to be with her.” ”
This kind of boy is often very warm-hearted, will take care of people, I believe that if your husband is this type of boy, then you must be married by him a lot of care.
So after marriage, you take care of the family better and better, thinking that such a husband will love you more, you may also be a model husband and wife in the eyes of friends.
But that’s when you found out he had this kind of online chat behaviour. This kind of boy must be the most willing to allow him to change because he is really good and excellent, but the family’s need for him is not enough, he felt at home no sense of accomplishment, slowly, the home has become a place to sleep, and his sense of achievement on the care of people is reduced.
So when someone needs to talk to him, he’s willing, and these boys don’t tend to cheat physically, but he wants to make these unfortunate women feel warm and find value because it makes him feel comfortable.
Meet this kind of man is simpler, think about when he chased you when you are how wayward petite, then next in front of him wayward petite let him serve you, but the difference is that now every service must remember to give him some reward Oh, such as a playful smile, a warm hug, let him enjoy taking care of your happiness!
Why do men in relationships go on dating sites—-What do you think about men 3
They’ll say, “We’re just talking and playing, and I mean it to you.” ”
If it’s this kind of chat you’re going to have to tell, first of all, are they really like that?
Second, is this person really uncharted?
Because this type of online chat, often break through the constraints of reality, the possibility of face base is the greatest.
They tend to get involved in chatting, such as giving each other gifts, giving red envelopes and other engaging behaviour. This is the type that needs to be watched out for most because in this case, a man must compare you to that girl.
Now say to you is sincere, just to temporarily stabilize you, because your value is higher, but the heart has begun to have some dissatisfaction, just dare not say.
At this time the women will put pressure on him, set the rules, establish the bottom line, control the economic power. At the same time to create a beautiful atmosphere to understand the real needs of boys, do not pay attention to every sentence he said: “it doesn’t matter, it’s OK.”
Learn enlist and give in, and take the lead in this relationship. When a boy does something good for your relationship to give him some encouragement and affirmation, it’s better to give him a kiss, a compliment, or a reward for something delicious (sexual reward is also a good reward).
Incentive strategies vary in degree.
At the same time, to prevent more rewards from working, we have to change the method to reward.
Now society is full of beautiful girls. Open the website to see the news will jump out of the handsome guy I’m waiting for you, so completely rely on control to let a boy not chat online, very difficult!
Coupled with the fact that it does bring pleasure to boys, the more depressed they become, the more rebellious they become. No matter how you swear in front of you, tap the phone is a whole new world, you can’t control his mind.
Smart women will review the situation, learn how couples get along, read the love of the people, master the dominant power.