You may be familiar with statistics that claim that men consider sex every seven seconds.”Signs and Symptoms of Sex Addiction”
The statement raised doubts among the gentlemen they had heard, not least because there was no research to support it. After all, if someone is thinking about doing it 500 times an hour (8,000 times a day), it’s hard to see how someone can accomplish anything.
So let’s ask a question that everyone wants to know: Is it normal to be thinking about sex all the time?
According to a 1995 survey by the Kinsey Institute, 54 percent of men said they considered having sex several times a day, while 43 percent said they thought about sex several times a week or several times a month. Only 4 percent said they think at least once a month. Notably, the Kinsey Institute survey covered men of all ages, meaning their libido was different.
But when do all these sober thoughts become a problem when it comes to sex, even disturbing your day-to-day work?
The line between a typical man and a sex addict can become blurred. To find out, AskMen spoke with three experts to clarify the differences.
Dr. Joshua Klapow, a clinical psychologist and host of The Kurre and Klapow Show, asserts that men’s libido varies widely, and that age is one of the key factors affecting libido. However, even within the same age range, it is difficult to define what is “normal”.
“Young men (17-30 years old) produce more testosterone on average and have a higher libido than older men,” he explains. However, environmental and biological factors can have a significant impact on this. We see people in their 20s with moderate motivation, while people in their 50s have a lot of motivation. Sexual experiences, social norms, learning history, and expectations (i.e. how much sex they’ve had in the past) can all influence the extent of libido. ”
Clapper also points out that living environments can affect libido. For example, stress, sadness, anxiety, and lack of sleep can all play a role in your sexual interests and activities.
Dr. Dawn Michael, .com clinical sexologist at TheHappySpouse, points out that every man has his own unique libido.
“Sexual desire may depend on the pattern of masturbation and sexual release (orgasm) in men,” she said. “If a man orgasms every day, his body adapts to this pattern.””Signs and Symptoms of Sex Addiction”
Given that the Kinsey Institute study covers participants of such a wide age group, it is difficult to identify any specifications for a particular group from the survey results. However, a 2016 study by Ohio State University was a more reliable source of information because it focused on men between the ages of 18 and 25, said Dr. Leslie Beth Wish, a licensed clinical psychotherapist and relationship specialist and author of Train Your Love Intuition.
The researchers provided participants with a counting machine that they used to track their sex views. On average, participants had about 19 explicit thoughts per day (or once every 1.26 hours). This may come as no wonder, but these people think about food almost every day (18 times a day).
In other words, even if you want to have sex once every hour or two, you’re on average for young men. How do you know if it’s becoming a problem? According to Clapper, it’s a red flag if you’re so addicted to sexual ideas that they interfere with your ability to work, learn, maintain relationships, or socialize.
What indications are you a sex addict?
Experts say the definition of “sex addiction” is subtle and subtle – in fact, there is no official medical diagnosis.
“We have to be careful to label someone as sexually addicted,” Michael said. “The label of sex addiction is complex and often abused. Some men are labelled as sex addicts by their partners, and they may not have the same libido at all. ”
That is, there are some signs that you are experiencing forced sex. Below, you’ll look at some of the most common addiction indicators through Klapow and Wish:
Change your daily life and be able to have sex even in the event of adverse consequences (lack of work, school, family and community responsibilities).
Regular selective work, working hours, time with family, and other responsibilities
Feel relaxed, irritable, depressed and angry when you are unable to have sex (because you can’t regulate your mood without sexual activity)
Engage in risky behaviour to satisfy a sexual desire (e.g. infidelity or unprotected sex)
The frequency of masturbation you need continues to increase
You can’t concentrate because you lose sleep due to masturbation or searching for porn on the Internet.
Repeated violations of the law to pursue your sexuality
It is important to note that sexual addiction is often characterized by an expanding sexual activity. This is no different from drug addiction, where you need to increase the dose of the substance to achieve the same pleasant effect. For example, you may be forced to incorporate more risk factors into your sex life to be more excited, or you may need to look for increasingly stubborn pornography to achieve orgasm.
She added: “Our brains and bodies are like changes. Imagine if you had to eat three meals a day that you liked. This loss of pleasure forces people to try something new. Whichever option you choose, likely, it will no longer be satisfactory, so people will fall into an endless cycle. ”
What if you think you might be addicted?
Even if some of these signs sound familiar, all experts agree that sex addiction is not something that should be self-diagnosed.
Hopefully, from the root causes of addiction, you may overlook medical issues such as mental illness or hormonal imbalances. Also, Michael points out that past traumatic experiences may be the cause of this behaviour, and it’s best to work with professionals such as licensed counsellors or therapists.
“Ideally, consult a mental health professional who specializes in sexual addiction,” Klapow advises. “The key is to realize that if you think you have a sex addiction, you can’t change your behaviour on your own. It is important to contact a mental health professional because sex addiction is not a diagnosis in itself, but is often associated with problems with other mental illnesses (e.g. bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, mania, etc.). ”
If you can’t find a licensed professional in your area who specializes in sex addiction, contact a licensed mental health professional or talk to your primary care physician.
Bottom line? If your sexual thoughts and activities hurt your life in any way, it may be time to figure out how to deal with these obsessive-compulsive disorders. If not, take a deep breath and know that those naughty frequent thoughts are perfectly normal – in fact, it just indicates a healthy, positive libido.