Aristotle once said that human beings are social animals, it is in the process of social cooperation, we can go from ancient times to the present, to the present, it is because of the mutual attraction between men and women, so that we go to the temple of marriage, together to raise the next generation.
So how do we get attracted to each other? Psychologically speaking, the attraction of interpersonal relationships is a positive attitude between people or a fondness for emotions.
Interpersonal attraction is related to five factors:
4, the return in the relationship;
5, the attractiveness of appearance.
What makes a man attractive? First, the proximity
The essence of proximity lies in our access to and interaction with each other, as well as our acquaintance and exposure to each other.
In our daily lives, we feel good about people who are geographically close and physically close. The psychologist Feistinger, who has experimented with different dorm buildings at university, has found that those who are unfamiliar with each other tend to choose those who are closer to each other in their friendship choices. So I can understand the hardships and difficulties of love in different places because it is contrary to human.instincts.
Proximity means accessibility and interactivity, while also easily deepening mutual comfort.
But some people have said that some girls I chase her every day, very good to her, but she just doesn’t like me and even blackened me. Isn’t that contrary to exposure and familiarity?
In fact, the “exposure effect” is not to increase mutual affection, but to amplify each other’s original feelings.
If that person first sees you and feels good about you, then increasing familiarity and exposure really heat your feelings. But she doesn’t feel very good about you at first, so how you add to it will only make her more annoying to you. So when you meet for the first time, it often determines whether you can walk together in the future.
What makes a man attractive? Second, the similarity
The similarity is well understood, psychology says so, essentially the same traits, we meet will have a feeling of like.
Psychologists have done an experiment in which Mr. Good and Mr. Bad communicate with different people.
Mr. Good is the kind of guy who will agree with whatever you say, you like music, movies, etc., and he’s just like you. You’ll think he’s kind and happy with him. When Mr. Good makes some hair scratching, collar movements, you will unconsciously make similar moves. And as the conversation progresses, your physical distance from each other will continue to grow closer.
Mr. Bad is the kind of thing you say you have to sing the opposite tune, you say who you like who, he will be sarcastic, say how bad. You’re going to get bored the whole process, and he’s doing some little physical moves, and you’re going to be unresponsive because you’re thinking about leaving him as soon as possible. When he approaches you, you will unconsciously move to keep your distance from him.
What makes a man attractive? Third, Complementarity
Complementarity refers to the interpersonal attraction that people form because they can avoid each other’s strengths and meet each other’s strengths and needs. Just like a couple, boys are very strong, girls are very obedient, they form a family together is complimentary.
But the premise of complementarity is that both husband and wife agree on the values within the male and female owners, so the most important thing about the complementary two people together is that both sides agree on the same values, and the other must have their own lack of but very much looking forward to the traits.
The reward in a relationship is that you can be rewarded directly or indirectly for being together. Just as some boys like girls who are in good shape and look healthy, because he subconsciously thinks the other person is very helpful to the next generation. And girls like to rely on strong boys, or to put it out, boys with good financial conditions because the other side can give them more security.
These are in line with the principle of reciprocity. The principle of reciprocity is that the parties to the relationship can provide what each other needs and enable them to pay enough in exchange.
Doesn’t that sound familiar? Because that’s the law of our business community, exchanging material information with each other and benefiting each other.