What is the Psychology of relationship and love?
1, the Matthew effect in love: the more people invest, the less easily cherished, the more self-interested people are more attractive
The Matthew effect manifests it itly in love: the stronger the strong, the weaker the weak.
When you are willing to pay more for yourself, and constantly improve themselves, your personal attractiveness is enhanced, thereby enhancing personal attractiveness, and when you are begging each other, you will let the other side spoil and proud, you continue to “devalue” in the process of investment, the other side in the process of investment constantly “value-added”.
2. Murphy’s Law in Love: The more you care about him, the easier it is to behave badly
You will find that the more you care about a person, the heavier your loss of heart becomes. The more you love him, the harder it is to control, and the more likely it is to lead to a performance loss.
And when you hold the ordinary heart, normal play, your personal charm will be displayed in full, more easily get the favor of the other side.
3, intermittent reinforcement: the smartest “tame” method, so that he can never stop you
He did an experiment in which three cats were placed in three different devices, the first cat would give the cat food at the touch of a button, the second cat would give the cat food at random even if it touched the button, and the third cat would not give the cat food even if it touched the button.
Experiments have found that the second cat touches the button the most frequently.
In the feelings, this “random reward” also applies: every time he asks you out, you have to answer, over time he will naturally feel that about you meet without any challenge, produce slack psychology, but you do not agree every time, he will feel no room, easy to give up directly;
4, Romeo and Juliet effect: the more obstacles, the deeper the feelings
When the emotional basis is the same for the other person, the more external resistance, the more they love each other.
5, the first cause effect: the first side of the feeling, directly determine the other side’s overall impression of you
When the two men and women first met, the impression of “the after-effects” was the most profound.
The near-cause effect” means that with the emergence of multiple stimuli, the formation of our impressions depends largely on the latest stimuli.
It is not difficult to explain why the “peaceful break-up” brings better memories to both sides, and tearing the face of the two separated, later remember each other is also resentful gritted teeth.
Psychology of relationship and love
Projection effect refers to: a person is easy to impose their own characteristics on others, think that the other side also has the same feelings, will, characteristics.
For example, you never refuse to be kind to others, so you suspect that your lover is also outside “not active, not refusing, not responsible”, so that according to their own guesses, constantly looking for clues to confirm the guess.
7, suspension bridge effect: “heartbeat” does not mean “like”
Perhaps you often have this feeling: a moment, in a scene, will be a weekday completely unsym sense of the person suddenly moved, so you think you like each other, and then make countless behavior to cater to their own hypothensis.
In fact, this is a typical “suspension bridge effect”: the environment scene caused your physical tension, heart rate accelerated, so you will put this situation to the heart of the people around you.
8, look at the effect: the psychological basis of the long-term love
Charongz, a psychologist, did an experiment in which he showed participants photos of the opposite sex 20 times, 10 times and 1 time, and then asked them to rate how much they liked the people in the photos. The experimental results showed that the photos with the highest number of appearances were the most popular. In other words, the number of views increased.
9. Uplifting effect: The right lover will make you better
The more you remember the person you love, the better you want to be for him.
10, reverse effect: the deeper you love, the deeper you hate
The more people who pay in the relationship, the easier it is to “blacken” when separated, or in the pursuit of the process, the other party cannot fall in love, it is easy to turn against each other into hatred, hate by love. This is called the “reverse transformation” of love.
In psychology, the situation of human beings (especially men) who see dissocursions is attributed to the “Guru effect”. This effect is found in many mammals.
As reflected in the body, humans, as higher mammals, also inevitably retain this trace.
Therefore, the individual’s self-discipline and sense of responsibility at this time is particularly important.
11, racket effect: when quarrelling, why more noisy and fiercer?
As the name suggests, when you hit the ball hard, the greater the pressure on the surface, the higher it bounces.
In the quarrel, you say I keep attacking each other, make people bear more pressure, the greater the potential to play;
12, love effect: people are always the first to notice those who like themselves.
A considerable part of the “love compensation effect” is attributed to the “love compensation effect”.
People are always interested those who are friendly to themselves. When a person shows a tendency to like you, as long as his own value is good, you will unconsciously look for each other’s strengths, unknowingly easy to like each other.
13, zegnik effect: what you don’t get is always the best.
Playing hard to get “is a classic that appeals to the human nature, and psychologically it’s a memory effect: it’s about people who are more impressed with things that haven’t been done yet than what’s been done.