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when the sex stops in your relationship,I finally accepted that we didn’t have sex.

Now, we’re sitting face-to-face in a high-end coffee shop enjoying a hard-won romance, cutting open my long-ordered cake for her, and I’m holding one of the pieces of bread in my mouth, just as she liked to feed me with her mouth at first, and the moment her lips touch, I seem to remember the taste of her lips. I admit that the last time I kissed her was a month ago.  

I am a 25-year-old, healthy man. She is a 24-year-old, healthy woman. We have been in love for three years, along the way, there are few contradictions, others envy us can be so smooth, and I just in the heart and silently said once: we have not had sex for a long time. “Happy birthday to you.” “Well. Go home. “I had three birthdays for her, and I remember the first time I ate a cake and hugged her for a long time, took pictures, and had sex together, and she curled up in my arms and fell asleep sweetly. Perhaps the longer the time is not a good thing, just like your left hand touch your right hand, already no feeling. At 12:30 p.m., I was holding my girlfriend’s hand under the bed, and she turned her back, ten fingers clasped, and at this point, each of my fingers was like a beating hormone, and said to her, “I want you.” I gradually put my head around her neck, at which point she suddenly pulled my finger away, turned over, and closed her eyes. And I, can only helplessly kiss her forehead, want to tell her “it’s okay.” “It was the second time this month that she had rejected me. I was surprised to find that our sex life from the first two or three days one time, to now once a month, or no existence at all. So much so that after I had communicated with her about it, she came up with a book that clearly stated what date the “task” would be completed. Turned around, I secretly opened my computer collection, non-stop slide, found the yellow film we had seen together a long time ago, at that time, she also looked shyly buried in my arms, and I happen to like to appreciate her shy face. I opened a short film, a film with a storyline, but the scale is not big. The hero is a blond boy, eight abs, legs are very long, very handsome, and I at this time with contemptuous eyes look at their own in the mirror, that tall thin, dressed very delicate boy disappeared, replaced by gradually fat waist hips, slightly raised stomach, and a long time did not take care of the hairstyle, a long time did not shave off the moustache. But I’m only 25. Can’t I? I began to deeply doubt myself, I said not only refers to sexual aspects of not but more is also in the busy life, I have begun to forget that I am still a young boy, as if and girlfriend after the emotional stability, I no longer want to dress. That day, we walked in the street, face to face with a couple of our age, handsome beauty is very bright, girlfriend suddenly came out a word, this man is so handsome ah. After that, I was like a careful-eyed girl, holding this sentence dead and not letting go, until late at night, I have been reminiscing. It was like punching me in the face, and the pain didn’t go away right away, it lasted in my emotions all the time.

I have a picture of ours in my work seat and sometimes I get a few glances at me when I’m at work. Then sadly, we didn’t seem to take a picture for a long time. In the beginning, we often go out to play together, and then she gave me all kinds of pictures, I will give her all kinds of pictures, so tired of the feeling lasted almost a year and a half, and then rarely go out to play so that take pictures. Mostly because we are each busier, in fact, I understand in my heart, not busy, we would rather nest on the sofa, lying on our cell phones, or watching TV, rather than thusly go out. 

Not long ago on Valentine’s Day (we made an appointment to go to the couple’s hotel, really haven’t been there for a long time). I was taking a bath in the bathroom, and as soon as she was lying in bed, I got a call and I reached out to turn off the tap and heard her say, “Excuse me, boss, I’ve tried to modify it.” “And then there’s a bunch of polite words with a laugh. After the call, I quietly looked out of the door, and she sat on the bed dazed and motionless. And when I came out of it, she suddenly stood up and “make love” and I held her waist and asked a sexually-free question: “Are you all right?” “The leaping eyes suddenly filled with melancholy, slowly climbing to the other end of the bed, ” not very good. “It’s been a long time since she’s said such a thing. I hugged her tightly from behind and patted her on the back. At this point, I just hope she can sleep in peace. You see, life is so magical that two positive young men and women suddenly become lifeless. No matter how big the flame can not burn at this moment, and we can only give in.

Seriously, I don’t have much expectation and fantasy about sex, just a fixed dish that everyone will eat in love, no matter how much you spend your mind on, how many ways to cook, eat for a long time or the same taste. More than just sex, I gradually found that it is difficult for us to find the original kind of blood, all kinds of anniversaries, holidays, we will not spend too much energy, some just a faint happy holiday, sometimes even what holiday do not know. The element of love that falls into us is less and less, and it is subtly transforming into another relationship, a relationship between lovers and loved ones.  

In fact, no matter how many partners you change, and then experience a few fresh love, the bland period will come as scheduled. (Recommended for related articles: How long does the honeymoon stage last? What’s next?) In fact, there are no long-term hormones. Perhaps you should recognize a person’s most primitive appearance, you see her as a relative when how to treat you, how she faces this love, how to face you ten years later. If you’re not disappointed in the process, that’s what guarantees us a longer period of love. I also slowly learned that kind of family and lovers between the sense of ambiguity, to be more peaceful, she did a good job of this. When we first moved in, the pursuit of refinement and high-end, we bought a lot of green plants, bought a lot of flowers, we put the whole house as good-looking as net red. In fact, these good-looking things were destroyed in less than half a year. And just yesterday, when I cleaned the room, I found her copybook, which clearly recorded this month we have every expense, as well as need to buy things, a frying pan, but also need to pay 100 yuan gas charges and so on, clear. Just then, she hurried to the kitchen with a pot in her hand. Hey, come and help, you love sausage paste! She yelled in the kitchen. The flowers on the balcony had already fallen to ashes, and the pots and pans were polished with oil; she remembered a little poorly and always couldn’t remember where the key was, but she brought me the sausages I wanted to eat when I took the bus the other day. Your new pot can still paste, you’re so good! As I laughed, I rushed over to close the fire. She doesn’t call my husband anymore, and I don’t call her baby anymore. The paste of the sausage spread in the air, and I was still happy to open my mouth full of bites. I’ve probably accepted that we’ve had very little sex, and I’ve come to like our little love affair. When the dull period comes, maybe real love begins to appear. When the bland period comes, perhaps true love begins to appear.

Reference documents: Seth Stephens-Davidowitz, former Google data expert——Big data, new data, and what I can tell us about the real you and me in the corner of the internet.

Recommend Reading:How to attract a man physically6 Tips For Making Yourself Irresistible.

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